On Sunday I heard a message about fasting- I’ve heard them many times before, and always brushed it off as something I can’t do because of my unique stomach.  I also often thought that fasting was just trying to manipulate God.  But I gave up something else this week, coffee, and anything other than water. Why?  Because my son had a life changing MRI on Thursday.

  5 days, I could make it 5 days.  I wasn’t just fasting for specific healing, I was fasting for peace in the journey.  Maybe it was because I wasn’t caffeine fueled, but most assuredly, I found that peace.  I was looking at Friday thinking, what if I mess up before then- and it was a major focus.  Then I realized that’s how I was viewing the MRI, that it was my only focus.  I found life in the present moments- we laughed, we had fun, we had a great week living in the present instead of worrying about the future.  Would my worry change anything?

No, but my prayer could.  When God calls us to fast- we are utterly relying on him to fill that void.  After Ibuprofen on the second day, God did just that.  When ever I grabbed a bottle of water I remembered why I was drinking it, and prayed- prayed for good MRI results -as any mother would do- but also for Gods will and plan for Tripps life to be played out according to Gods, not mine. 

 I felt a little like Hannah, giving her son back to God- for Him to use for her purpose.  Then God made it even sweeter with Tripps declaration to want to tell as many as he could about God in his life, however long it might be.  

So do I believe in fasting now? Absolutely!  And Tripps got two more hours of MRI…. The peace that transcends all understanding has filled my soul and I don’t know how to explain it.  If Tripps MRI comes back with a ‘no go’ report, my heart will break, I will mourn, but I will Know- this is not my will and God is doing a mighty thing, I just get the front row seat, drinking my coffee.